Tuesday, February 21, 2006

jurisprudence of public speaking

The volume in the classroom varies drasticly during the day, depending on the activity. There are number zero activities where no talking is allowed. During a number one activity there is a minimal amount of communication allowed, but only when necessary. And then there are numbers two and three, where three would be at free centres time and all sorts of fun and exciting sounds are welcome and expected.

There are several students in my class, boys mostly ( its always the boys isn't it ) that love to talk loudly, and especially to someone on the opposite end of the classroom. They will be in mid shout when they will receive the evil teacher eye from me or hear the first syllable of their name from my lips, and they will know that the sound laws have been broken. Quickly, and ever so humbly, they will give me the look which shows they realize their transgression and peace is once again restored...until the next exciting communication opportunity, and the cycle repeats. "But it's not because he is deliberately being disobedient", I tell the parents at interview time. "He's just a kid and he's excited".

Every Thursday before lunch time we have free writing in our journals. This is a time where the students can write about any topic whatsoever...and there will be no editing by me, none at all. I won't even care if they write about Bionicles or Barbies, Nintendo or My Little Pony. The only rules are that they can't use potty language and can't use repeated words...such as "I love my teacher very, very, very, very, very,very much." The kids like to do that so they get their quota of words in without working too hard. Plus I give them secret bonus marks for saying something really nice about me...it's my love language.

When the writing is done, they are each given an opportunity to come to the "stage" which I have set up ( a music stand and a microphone hooked up to my boom box). When the reading is going on, it is considered, for the students listening, to be a number zero activity, no exceptions. If this law is broken during public speaking, the teacher's death stare becomes thrice multiplied.

It was excited boy's turn to read. He walked to his position and began, quite confidently, to read his tale of St. Valentines love. Near the end of his 90 second oration, his speech began to increase in speed and intensity...almost in a panic. When he finally finished, he was breathing heavy and looked really upset. I asked him if he was O.K. and he very quickly said "No...I peed my pants." As he made his way out from behind the music stand I could see the facts. "You shouldn't have called me up there..." he shouted. "I had to go to the bathroom." Without trying to defend my position and realizing his utter embarrassment, I quickly whisked him out to the bathroom, but not before giving the death stare to three students who were laughing.

We returned from the changeroom and all was remedied..all except his pride. Excited kid number two, from the other end of the classroom, calls out through the silence of the number zero activity, "That's O.K....It happens to me all the time." And suddenly a mini discussion begins about wetting ones pants, who still wears pull-ups, and, "I wet my bed lots of times."

Sometimes it's O.K. to break your own laws of silence, and allow good, spontaneous, and honest speech take place.

6 comments:

andrea said...

This post reminds me of a couple of things. The first is my younger son's trials and tribulations with Grade 1 when his teacher was a control freak extraordinaire. Once, when she was getting all hot and bothered about what he had (or hadn't) produced during what was supposed to be a student-led conference, I felt compelled to remind her that "He's only 6. He's really not going out of his way specifically to annoy *you*." (OK, I was this teacher's worst parental nightmare, but after providing her with the perfectly compliant child first go-round, I figured I could get away with it.)

This also reminds me of being in Grade 2 and Heidi peeing at her desk. I wasn't even smug about it, even though she regularly beat me up behind the church (Ok, once or twice). Last time I saw her she was delivering a speech on TV as the then high-profile president of the B.C. Medical Association (and practicing GP).

joyce said...

I was going to stay off the computer this morning, but then decided to check the weather and e-mails. You made me cry. I love to hear about what you do in the classroom. It's no wonder you are loved and highly revered. (did you manage to get by without puking?)

Andrea: our Jane has a freak for a teacher this year, and she asks me to please go to school every day and speak to the principal and the teacher until she gets nicer.....
not fair.

Brian the Mennonite said...

Andrea: I find it best to simply listen during parent interviews. The parents simply want to be heard, not listen to me give all kinds of evaluation of what is up with their child.

I think many people will be able to recall at least one situation where someone, if not themselves, peed at school...and not in the toilet either.

Joyce: That is nice of you to say...although making you cry happy tears isn't really a difficult task. All I have to do is let you in for half an hour, and you're an unformed earthen vessel in my hands. I love you for that.

O.K. Andrea I love you too...I don't want anyone to feel left out. :)

andrea said...

*sniff* Thank you ... boo hoo hoo ... I wish you were my teacher *and* my daddy! :)

kyknoord said...

Public speaking often has a similar effect on adults, so at least you're allowing him to get it out of his system early :)

Brian the Mennonite said...

Andrea: You have only three school days left to be a student in my classroom...my term is done after Tuesday. Now it's me whos crying :(

Kyknoord: In more ways than one.